Last Winter We Parted by Fuminori Nakamura

Author:Fuminori Nakamura [Nakamura, Fuminori]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
ISBN: 978-1-61695-456-7
Publisher: Soho Press
Published: 2014-10-20T16:00:00+00:00

(11)

THE HUGE CLOCK hanging on the wall seems to have stopped moving.

“I think I want to quit working on this project.”

The moment I say it, I feel a small pang of regret, along with a calm sense of release. My editor gazes across at me, looking slightly dazed.

“Why …?”

“… It’s too much for me. I’m sorry.”

“I want you to explain to me, specifically. What happened?”

We are at my editor’s apartment. I stare at the glass of whiskey on the table. My editor is staring at the same thing. He lights a cigarette. I remain silent.

“… You mean, you’re in over your head?”

I look at the unmoving clock on the wall. It seems disproportionately large for the room. He opens his mouth to speak.

“Have you read Truman Capote’s In Cold Blood?”

“… I have.”

“After he completed his nonfiction novel, he couldn’t write another decent piece of work. His spirit was broken. Then again, at least he did finish that book.”

Akari Kiharazaka had said something very similar to me. My heart starts to race. My editor raises his voice slightly.

“Sure, the way that I do things may be relentless. Some have even called me pathological because I always push a writer beyond the limits of his abilities. And as a result, some writers’ spirits have broken. But I just want to make a good book. That’s all. It may sound callous, but I’m not thinking about the writer. The only thing I care about it is the work.”

“I understand that.”

“Really?”

The editor looks me straight in the eyes.

“Capote managed to write his all. He put his heart and soul into it. And you—you’re going to give up at this point?”

He still isn’t finished with what he has to say.

“It’s frustrating. I’m disappointed to hear your position. It sounds like you’re putting your personal life above your own work. Get out of here.”

He takes another drag from his cigarette.

“Don’t bother sending me your expenses. This will be a major loss for us. And I don’t want to deal with you anymore.”

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